The dilema of concluding.... If he is the one?

It was one of those lazy monotonous afternoons where I did not have anything much to do and Internet had come to my rescue. I was doing the usual internet surfing, when I found this article: http://www.scoopwhoop.com/inothernews/he-is-the-one-2/. It points to some 15 signs that could help you in concluding if he is the one. Surprisingly, I did go though the article although the title sounded cliched.  Accept it or not, Love still intrigues most of us. You might be how many ever relationships old you can never play a safe bet on anyone. With Love every experience is a new one.

It is always easier for me to tell what I do not want than explaining what I want. It is easier to point out what might definitely not work for me than pointing what would definitely work. As I pondered over the pointers in the article, each point on the list seemed important and a must have but when combined, the list looked unrealistic. Come on! it is too much to ask for in today's time.

When I try to match the qualities with the eligible guys I know, I come to the conclusion that finding those 15 points in one guy is next to impossible. Mr X might have always treated me equal and never put me down but he has never stood up for me! Mr Y might remember the little things about me but he loses his cool too often. Mr Z goes out of his way to make me feel special but never understands if something is bothering me. 

Gosh! when GOD could make almost perfect girls like me, why could he not make for us some almost perfect guys... :P

Anyways, coming back to finding if he is the one. I have derived a method to conclude. I know it might sound funny but really do not under estimate its power. What you need to do is sit with a pen and paper. On the paper mark two columns Good and Bad.

Start listing his good & bad things under the respective columns. Also, depending on its importance give each quality certain points. (High Priority=100 points; Medium Priority=50; Low Priority=10)

So for good qualities if a certain quality is important to you give 100 points and if certain good quality is not that important to you give lower points either 50 or 10.

Similarly for bad qualities if a quality he possesses is something you strongly do not wish for in a life partner than put higher points against that and for bad qualities you could do away with put lower points.

At the end total up the good and bad columns. For the right guy the grand total of 'Good' should always be as high as possible and the grand total of 'Bad' should always be as low as possible.

If the grand total of 'Bad' column is much higher than the 'Good' column than it is an outright NO for the guy.

If the grand total of 'Bad' column is almost equal to the 'Good' column than it is a gamble.

If the grand total of 'Bad' column is much lesser than the 'Good' column than it is a YES for the guy.

Analysis for an imaginary person 'X'

I am someone who is very practical and uses her head even in matters of heart. But truly speaking one cannot be this calculative in matters of heart. Hence, don't let your decision be the outcome of any analysis. Use them just as methods to summarize. Remember Mr Right is just a Right decision away!

   
 ~~Love isn't finding the perfect person, it's seeing an imperfect person perfectly~~

Rantz of a Single Girl

I open my mailbox to find not one but almost a dozen mails on the best gifting ideas this Valentine's, how and where I could celebrate Valentine's etc. I select all of them and transfer to trash without thinking twice. Darn! It feels as if these companies mock me by sending such mails.

Years have passed but there has been no change in my relationship status. Almost covered my quarter life staying single and very happy. I like my life like this.
Free, directionless, independent, impulsive & full of quirk! However, Valentine's Day is hyped so much that I feel I have committed a crime by not finding someone for myself.

What is the big deal man!
I am single by choice and love it like that. Being single is a better alternative than being with the wrong person and wasting 364 days of the year just to feel special on that one day.

As 14th Feb nears, singles please do not panic and run around frantically. Remember, even if you don't have that someone special, you have yourself, your family. Love and value yourself more than anyone. One day you are definitely going to meet someone, who makes you happy, makes you feel beautiful and stands by you even when you feel you don't deserve them!

Until then here is the list of things, you cud do on Valentine's:

1. Go for a movie with your single friends.

2. Pamper yourself by enjoying a SPA session

3. Take your parents on a holiday.

4. Shop till you drop. Give yourselves the best gifts.

5. Relish those cup cakes, chocolates and ice-creams. You don't have to worry about those extra kilos!

And if you are someone like me who feels this day is commercialized and is just another day to make money then work could come to your rescue! It's not a national holiday you could work and live it like any other day!


~~If you are Single. Remember,  it's just because GOD isn't ready to share you yet~~

Renedezous of 3 Idiots

As quoted by Virginia Woolf

               "Some people go to priests; others to poetry; I to my friends”

Couldn't have agreed more. Life looks much simpler by just being around the right people. Those right ones are Best Friends. :)

Pune the city with which I share a love-hate relationship has somehow been very kind to me in terms of Friendships. It has gifted me friends that I can cherish for a lifetime.

B-R-E-A-K was what I needed desperately. A holiday with people who have known me long enough to decipher the unspoken words. Who have seen me getting out of plights and fights. Who have known my small secrets and big blunders. It could be none other than my Engineering Friends : Fatty and Catty.

3 Idiots

After a lot of plans being made and dissolved we finally zeroed down on a place called Coorg which is close to Banglore. We three idiots belong to different religious backgrounds, have different mind sets, live in different cities but are glued together with a strong bond of friendship. A friendship of more than 7 years. A friendship that sailed through tough times but emerged as a winner. 

I, Fatty and Catty were set to relive our college days. We geared up for our journey full of incessant talks, good food, crazy ideas, juicy gossips and devilish laughs. The trip surprisingly did go as per the plan. Amidst the lush greenery we reminisced about our college days. We poured our hearts out to each other and laughed uncontrollably over silly things.  We just let ourselves free for those 3 days.

Now that I am back from the trip I can say that my heart was so much in need of those good times. I am  all charged up to battle out the mundane life & monotonous work with my everlasting smile.

I say Good Friends are the medicine for a healthy and long life. Stay connected and close to them. :)

PS: Catty and Fatty are not their real names or for that matter even nick names. These names are  used in the post to keep their identities hidden.  Icing on the cake is they are going to hate these names.

WHAT’s In My Name??

In a crowded Mumbai street, shout ‘NEHA’ aloud and you realize at least half a dozen girls turn around. Yes, Yes! Neha is a very common name in India. About 2 decades ago this was such a favorite pick that, every family had one girl named NEHA. It’s almost 23 years I have been living with this name. Whatever the world feels about this name, it’s mine and I am bound to love it.

Your name is your identity but sharing it with someone else can be quite annoying at times. Moreover, for a person like me who feels so high about herself it comes as a big huddle. On my first day in primary school, I was surprised to know that there were almost 7 Neha’s in my class. I was so different than them yet I felt my name left no place for me to standout.  

With time I became immune to the commonness of my name.  Surprisingly, whenever I ask who choose this name for me, I get different replies from everyone in my family.  It doesn’t matter how this name came up because a lot is hidden behind these four letters. It’s now my identity and after knowing what it means I have always felt positive about it.

 

Let me take this as a privilege to highlight to you what NEHA means. NEHA is a common Indian name that originates from the Sanskritlanguage. In Sanskrit it means love. It also means Varsha i.e. Rain. NEHA is a symbol of love. This name defines someone who loves and is loved. NEHA means affection. I am lovable! Isn’t it? I spread love and happiness all the time. I believe this name has in way shaped up who I am. I don’t quite understand, how I can connect Rains with myself (I hate rains). However I feel the true meaning is a combination of both: 'NEHA is the Rain of Love'.

Historians believe the true meaning of NEHA is of Japanese origin and means rich rusty trombone. Maybe that’s the reason why I am so inclined towards learning music, musical instruments and listening to music.

 

 

Few facts about the name NEHA and how strongly I relate to them.

•  It’s believed that, people with the name Neha have a deep inner desire for a stable, loving family or community, and a need to work with others and to be appreciated.True: For my calm heart I need stability. By the way, I crave for appreciation too. ;)
•  People with the name Neha tend to initiate events, to be leaders rather than followers, with powerful personalities.Very True: I hate being a follower. I like to take the lead everywhere.
• They tend to be courageous and sometimes aggressive. As unique, creative individuals, they tend to resent authority and are sometimes stubborn, proud, and impatient.True:  yes these negative traits are very much a part of me.

 

I am sure most of you are excited to research about your name. Remember, everything works for you until mind starts questioning the beliefs.

 

Letting the secret out ;)

           There is one compliment I have been hearing since a long time. People tell me I have a beautiful smile. “Seriously? “, I ask them baffled.  Yes they reply instantly and ask how I manage looking beautiful and staying happy all the time. I accept the compliment graciously with a smile.

But do you want to know the secret of that beautiful smile ???

         The secret is I want to smile. The reason is I want to stay Happy. Anyone who takes that effort to smile and enjoy the very moment will remain HAPPY. The secret of Happiness & Beauty is nothing more than a heart that wants to stay happy and wants to keep doing that every day.

When I was a young girl studying in school, every Sunday evening I used to go for a walk with mom dad. Most of the times I walked behind them analyzing what all things I wanted so as to be the happiest.  Three things topped my list: learning to drive, a personal computer, my own room. Now after almost 13 years I have  covered almost the entire wish list. However, I realized driving to work in my own car, coming back and sleeping in my own room and owning a laptop doesn't  give the Happiness that I get chatting with my friends over a cup of coffee. It doesn't give me the same pleasure that I get when I dance for hours with my closest friends.

            With time we realize the truth  behind Happiness. No one’s life is bereft of happiness. It's a part of you. The very human nature is to be happy. We keep searching happiness in the accomplishment of our short and long term goals. These goals might take years to complete. Does that mean we will remain cranky all through the years??Why leave even a single day or a single moment of being happy. Don’t associate happiness with your ambitions. Search for ways to enjoy each passing day.                                                                                        

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar says :

”Happiness depends on your mind. When mind is free of past impressions and future cravings happiness is there.”

Perfect isn’t it. With such simplicity he has given the key to a happy heart. You need to forget about the past, stop thinking about the future and stay in present. When you are in present everything looks perfect and when everything is perfect you become happy. :)

            Another way of staying happy is being around positive people happy people and who else will be a better option than kids. The idea is to surround oneself with children and dive into the ocean of happiness. Love gives Happiness. They say in every child GOD resides.  Hence, a child’s love is the purest form of love.  Once a child connects with someone the nexus is too strong to be shaken.  I have been around a lot of kids and one such sweet child is ‘Yogesh’.

           It was a Saturday morning and I took the liberty of waking up a bit late than my usual time. As I checked my phone I saw 2 missed calls from an unknown number.  I called on the number and I could feel the voice was a known one. In a min I guessed that it was Yogesh. Excited he said ”Didi main pass ho gaya”. My delectation knew no bounds. I was delighted that he had passed his exams but I was more pleased to know that he wanted to share his happiness with me.  Who was I to him? Just a girl who came every Sunday with bunch of her friends and taught him. Kids have so much love to give that you can never be sad around them. Their love crosses all boundaries of religion, caste, language and economical backgrounds. They just want to get and spread love.

            If kids can do that why can’t we. When you wake up every morning, be happy that you have another day to live, another day to love your dear ones , to eat , to sing and  pray. A gesture of love can make someone's day and that will make your day. Give lift to someone who is trying to get inside a packed bus. Share your tiffin with that kid who works on the small tea stall outside your workplace, listen to your favourite track, browse through your childhood pictures, go on a walk with your mom, hug someone really tight. Just do something every day. Be happy and make someone smile every day.

Happiness is just somewhere around, disguised in various avatars. Just decide that you want to be happy and you will get plenty of reasons to be happy. J